At the beginning of the first semester last year, I had an introductory meeting with my new supervisor. We talked about my grades, my career aspirations, how I was feeling about going into my final year; the usual. These were all questions I was expecting, and I answered them easily. What I wasn’t expecting was the last question she posed to me: “What are your hobbies?” I can’t even remember what I told her. That I liked reading, probably (which is true, but nothing particularly ground-breaking coming from someone doing an English Literature degree). Afterwards, I stumbled out of her office and walked home, my fists balled up in my coat pockets and my brain whirring away as I kept thinking the same thing over and over again; “What are my hobbies…what are my hobbies?"
I’ve been thinking a lot about that moment recently. It feels acutely embarrassing, uncool even, to admit publicly that I don’t really have hobbies. I’m starting to understand why I don’t, though, and I think that it’s something a lot of people will be able to relate to. Hobbies, more often than not, feel to me like a waste of time. The problem is that I seem to have acquired the awful mindset that if something doesn’t get me a grade or improve my job prospects then it is, for all intents and purposes, useless. I’ve had this mindset for some time, since GCSEs at least (around the time I swapped writing poetry for more exam revision hours), and it only seems to have gotten worse as I get older. I’ll often admire someone else's hobby and think to myself, “I’d like to do that!”, but then I'll quickly become distracted by university work, or applying for a part-time job. Sometimes I’ll get as far as purchasing the supplies for said hobby – I have two bundles of wool and a crochet hook beside me as I type this – but they only sit in my room, abandoned and gathering dust. I just can't seem to find the motivation to spend precious time on something that I won't be able to submit to the VLE and get feedback on, or show in an interview to prove that I would be a valuable employee.
Not having a hobby other than reading books (which is often the last thing I want to do after reading all day for my degree) has its pitfalls, though. When I’m stressed and wanting to relax, I often find myself with an intense desire to do something creative, to let my feelings out. But I have… almost nothing. No outlet, no project to work on. I frequently find myself feeling frustrated at ‘past me’ for not committing to any of the things I showed a passing fancy to, but simultaneously too scared to take that first step and start something new that I could very well ‘fail’ at initially. As a student, failure has become something that I’m practically allergic to. I only ever want to be the best at something, so if I’m not the best at it immediately, why try at all?
I interviewed some of my peers to see whether other students felt the same way about hobbies as I do. One third-year Psychology student told me that because there’s no “endpoint” to university work, she very rarely feels like she has any time to spare for hobbies. A second-year English student said that he enjoys playing the keyboard because it allows him to express himself creatively, but that taking the time to play music makes him feel guilty because he feels like he’s “slacking off” when he's doing it; “even though it’s fun, it doesn’t feel like I’m doing enough actual work”.
It’s so easy to feel like you should only prioritise ‘productivity’. In fact, the term ‘hobby’ itself has seemingly become synonymous with ‘side hustle’, a project you do outside of work or university to make an income. Furthermore, if you search ‘hobbies’ on Google many of the results display lists on job sites of CV-friendly hobbies. These lists will tell you what hobbies you can take up that signify to the employer that you possess valuable skills for the work environment. For example, saying that you play football on your resume is another way of saying that you work well in a team, and telling a recruiter that you play video games shows them that you can strategize and think outside of the box. Of course, there is nothing wrong with making money from a hobby, nor with including your hobbies on your CV. It would be wrong of me to tell fellow students not to do something that could make them money or improve their career prospects. However, I do think that it’s important that we try to steer away from the idea that a hobby has to always have some kind of tangible, ‘productive’ result because individuals like myself are being prevented from starting a hobby they might really enjoy by the very loud cultural ethos that places ‘the grind’ and employability above all else. It’s hard for me to find the motivation to pick up my crochet hooks and start a granny square because all I can think is “but what skills will this give me that I can put on my cover letter for X or Y job”?
Thankfully, there is reason to hope for a world in which hobbies are not just framed as time wasters or CV boosters. ‘The Hobby Cave’ is an art project in collaboration with Artangel that aims to be “the loudest presentation of our quiet pastimes”. On the website for the project, UK citizens are encouraged to submit pictures and descriptions of their favourite hobbies, whatever shape they take. In a video explaining the project, Hetain Patel talks about his own hobbies, which include handcrafting Spiderman costumes and turning a car into a Transformer robot with his father. “I tend to show this stuff in galleries”, he says, “but to be honest, even if I didn’t, I’d still be making this stuff anyway”. Patel’s attitude is one that I’d like to adopt; a sustained passion for the things I enjoy doing even if I’m the only one who appreciates them. Amidst a bustling capitalist society in which the notion of productivity is constantly being shoved down our throats, this art project looks to be a welcome reminder of what really matters. Sometimes, it’s the things that we do outside of work that give life meaning, that shape us into the wonderful, unique individuals that we all are.
I’ve come to realise that hobbies are vitally important. Maybe the most important things in the world. If all we ever focus on is our studies and work, and ignore every opportunity to slow down and express ourselves through painting, crocheting, gardening or any of the other hobbies that are out there to try, can we really call that living life? I don’t think so. With recent news suggesting that the retirement age may be pushed up to age seventy-one, we have got to start dedicating time to engaging in our passions outside of work. Unlike the generations before us, we might not have the time to do those things we put off for all of those years after we stop working. Ignore that part of you that tells you your passions are a waste of time. Write that story! Draw that fanart! Bake that complicated pastry! Do things because they’re fun and you love them!
With that, I’m going to go and compile all the poetry I’ve been writing about my cat over the last month and put it in a zine. Just for me (and my cat, of course).
