SOME OF THEM came, most of them saw, none of them conquered. Durham’s lacklustre effort was nowhere near enough to stop York from running away with the Varsity title for the first time since their inaugural victory on home soil in 2016.
Sat among the crowds on the packed 22 Acres was one Adam Philpott. Mr Philpott is Nouse’s second-best Sports Editor and, in his turn to write the Editor’s Comment last edition, took me to task for my unsuitably minimal attire while watching the rugby qualifiers on the RI. While wrapped up cosy in Nouse Towers, I came across a tweet from Mr. Philpott stating that he was cold and that the 22 was “rather chilly”.
I now call upon Adam to write me a formal apology for the rank hypocrisy that he expressed using this platform and will expect reparations of no less than £66bn paid in £1 pints. Alternatively, relieve me of the arduous task of Nouse Tries so I don’t have to make an arse out of myself in the manner which you certainly do while trying Quidditch in this edition.
Now that I’ve got back to it, I’d like to congratulate York Vision for getting back into print, especially our counterparts in Sports. Good show, gentlemen.
We’d like to say thank you to our friends at Palatinate Sport in Durham for their cooperation and general niceness during the day. We wish them luck in continuing the great coverage they offer the “best team-sports university”. Also, a reminder that York beat this university at men’s football, women’s football, men’s rugby, women’s rugby, and mixed lacrosse.
Varsity was a terrific success and I’d especially like to congratulate the women’s touch rugby teams for their brilliant victories and the women’s football teams for producing the most entertaining matches of the day. We couldn’t keep up with Constantine’s 6-4 victory against Trevelyan or Goodricke’s 4-3 victory against Josephine Butler. We have a great roundup in this edition of all the day’s proceedings.
To my dearly beloved Comment Editor (you know who you are), my name is Chay Quinn. I’m not Chegwin. I am not Chayquinn. Keep your Yorkshire self away from my name, you arse.
Nouse Love, Chay x