- The ever-ticking clock of doom that is third year has this week gotten much more real, as I recently turned 21. I am now at the age that I will be when I leave university. The prospect of the real world is shit scary.
- On the subject of turning 21, the scheduling robot decided that a 9am seminar the day after my birthday was a great idea. How can I be expected to be anything other than a drunken shell so soon after such messy celebrations?
- In a completely unrelated matter, I had to miss a 9am seminar the day after my birthday due to a sudden and crippling illness. This meant I had to self-certify, a process I loathe. Surely it’s pointless due to the ease with which you can lie? Not me, of course, but, y’know, other people…
- Freshers don’t seem to have got the message that Stone Roses bar should be home to indie and rock, and keep queuing poppy-chart rubbish on the jukebox. I don’t want to listen to Avicii surrounded by photos of the Gallagher brothers. Fuck off to Kuda you pop gremlins.
- Emma Goff-Leggett, former Nouse sub-editor.
- York Council keep haranguing me and my housemates for council tax, despite our numerous confirmations to them that we are students and therefore exempt. This warranted a never-ending phone call and what felt like hours of sub-par, classical-style hold music. Hours.
- Despite my status as a millennial and therefore supposedly all-round, tech-savvy dude, I still can’t get my head around Asda online shopping. I somehow managed to arrange a delivery for 7am on a Saturday. Weekly lie-in ruined.
- I’m aware that giving the freshers a second mention makes me seem like a grumpy old man, but fuck me their keenness in attending lectures at the start of term hasn’t half made getting a meal deal from Nisa a right palaver. The queues are despicable.
- Having recently stepped down from the Nouse senior team, I felt more than a little pang of sadness at leaving…until I realised I’d have to train the new lot in how to use the laying-up software. I hate newspapers, Nouse, computers, and especially Adobe InDesign.
- Finally, in my perpetual drunken stupor, I easily forget the substandard quality of York’s nightlife. I praised Fibbers to a visiting friend, only for us to go and him to tell me, “Jack, you’ve been in York too long if you think this is a good club”. Wounded
10 Things I Hate About Uni
Jack Davies moans about what’s pissing him off of late