Halifax students spend more time masturbating compared to other colleges, a survey conducted by Sexposé has revealed.
Two out of three students from the University’s biggest college masturbate three or more times per week, while the equivalent figure for Alcuin and Langwith is 51 per cent.
Loussin-Torah Pilikian, Chair of Halifax Student Association, said of the survey’s results: “Bigger is certainly better – our members take on a work hard, play hard kind of thing… Everyone needs some time off!”
Josh Lee, former chair of Alcuin said: “It’s no surprise Alcuin hold off from self pleasure what with the rising cost of university laundry. Socks are a scarce commodity and they don’t wash themselves.”
The data emerged in a survey for last Friday’s sex positive event ‘Sexposé: The Second Coming’. Conducted by LGBTQ, FetSoc and WomCom, it advertised a safe and fun attitude to sex by exposing misconceptions and discussing taboos. 844 completed the survey, making it the largest of its kind conducted at the University.
There was also significant data for male versus female sexual behaviour. Some of the results didn’t come as much of a surprise, with 82.1 per cent of men masturbating three times or more per week, compared to just 34 per cent of women.
One in three men masturbate every day while only five of the 286 men who completed the survey said they didn’t masturbate at all.
Women were much more likely to be let down by their first sexual experience. Eighty-four per cent expected it to be positive, but only sixty-seven per cent agreed that it was. Men, on the other hand, had negative expectations before losing their virginity, but considered it more positively afterwards.
The survey also revealed that men were more likely to have used porn to learn about sex, with 61 per cent agreeing or strongly agreeing with the statement, compared to 43 per cent of women.
Women are more likely to tell friends intimate details of sexual encounters with new partners (14 per cent), while men are twice as likely to not give any details away (32 per cent). Langwith and Vanbrugh are the biggest gossipers, but still behind the figure for women: just one in six don’t reveal details of the night before.
The survey also asked about sex education at school, with an overwhelming number saying it didn’t prepare them adequately for sexual relationships. A massive 86.2 per cent surveyed said it was inadequate.
Fifteen respondents said that they didn’t receive sex education because they were at Catholic schools, eleven bemoaned putting condoms on bananas, while two even commented that their sex education lessons could be compared to those in Mean Girls.
Teachers not recognising queer relationships was a common complaint. One person surveyed wrote: “They never talked about homosexuality, except to say it made you very unhappy and it was impossible for gay people to form meaningful relationships.”
Another wrote: “It never covered the emotional side of things that could happen, such as casual sex, drunk, not in your bed” and that “teachers were embarrassed by the subject they were teaching.”
Hugo Dale-Harris, who carried out the survey, said: “Sexposé was originally set up to tackle the shocking lack of awareness. It all started when one of the founder’s was talking with one of their housemates and they didn’t realise you could get STIs through oral sex“.
“It turns out guys like to masturbate… Yeah. I thought that would be a fun question.”
More worryingly, over one in three surveyed didn’t know or weren’t sure where they could go to get a sexual health check.
Dale-Harris added: ““You hope they’ve had STI checks somewhere else. The vast majority of people have had some sex, but there’s a taboo about getting an STI check that means you’ve been doing something you shouldn’t. Really anyone who’s had sex once should really go.
“The problem comes when people aren’t wanting to look.”
George Offer, YUSU Welfare Officer and former Halifax President, commented on the findings, telling Nouse: “I think that Sexposé is a great event, bringing together different groups from across campus to talk in an open (and often hilarious) way about sex, and I’m glad that it was so well attended – the great sucess of the event is a huge credit to the societies and networks involved!
“I think we should probably take the results of the survey with quite a serious pinch of salt, as the results are likely to demonstrate bias.
“Granted, I focused mostly on finding ways better to integrate families and international students into a broader college community, but while I was President of Halifax I didn’t notice a particularly substantial propensity for wanking!”