Reffed off and missed butts galore
What a specatacle! TM has been in, around, underneath and inside (no not in that way) the college cup action this past four weeks and must admit to being slightly perturbed. Mostly by that oaf Matt Butter. Or is that Bowyer? Either way there’s no place for Moulet-bashing in the beautiful game – just ask Roy Keane. He never used his head – just went in with studs showing.
The boy complained afterwards of foul play on the part of Goodricke captain fantastic ‘I used to play for Leeds’ Leadbeater, who said he was “going for the ball” when he viciously scythed down the Alcuin man. The ref really should’ve shoved them both off to the showers for a cool down but somehow they stayed on the pitch.
Talking of refs, you can’t just walk out in the middle of a game, yourself – like that Wenty Twos chap did a few weeks back! It’s a sacred duty, don’t you know, refereeing. Sure, Dan Taylor is a prat, a prot, a pudding-muching mad mouth on the sidelines, but don’t let him get to you, fellow – he’s only made of hot (and pretty stinky) air. Of course you’re “not a real ref” – we can see that – but you’ve got a bloody loud whistle there, matey, specially made to sting sensitive Taylor-shaped ears.
And haven’t there have been some cracking misses so far, too? Goodricke Twos boss Sneddon cheekily brought himself on for a cameo run-out against Vanbrugh but scuffed a simple one-on-one. Awful. Worse, though, was Ed Lacaille’s earth-shattering miss against Langwith Seconds. Miss of the cup…no, season…goddamn it, that miss made Sneddon look like Raul. Take a bow, son, take a bow.
Flying High
Goodricke Seconds outplayed Vanbrugh Firsts in the one of the biggest ever cup upsets a couple of weeks back to give themselves a fantastic shot at reaching the quarter-finals. The way that ‘Tank’ had University Firsts captain Matt Witherwick in his back pocket all game was a sight to behold.
Mid-Table Safety
Alex Cooper put in a decent performance against Halifax Thirds but has struggled for Fantasy Points so far and his reputation demands greater input. The man with the wizardly left foot has so much class that if he raises his game, he could dominate the knockout stages.
Relegation Zone
That’s right, you guessed it, Vanbrugh Firsts are in the relegation zone this week…the whole lot of them. Witherwick is joined by the rest of his underpeforming team-mates – sluggish at the back and in the midfield and bumbling up top. They can still rescue their Cup, but it’ll be jolly hard work.
Group 1 (N.B. all data correct on Sunday Week 6)
| Team | Pl. | W. | D. | L. | GD. | Pts. |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Goodricke 1s | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 9 |
| Halifax 2s | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 6 |
| Alcuin 2s | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 |
| Langwith 1s | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3 |
| Derwent 3s | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | -13 | 1 |
Group 2
| Team | Pl. | W. | D. | L. | GD. | Pts. |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Derwent 1s | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 9 |
| Vanbrugh 1s | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 6 |
| Goodricke 2s | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | -2 | 6 |
| Langwith 2s | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | -5 | 1 |
| Halifax 3s | 4 | 0 | 1 | 3 | -7 | 1 |
Group 3
| Team | Pl. | W. | D. | L. | GD. | Pts. |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Alcuin 1s | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 12 | 9 |
| James 1s | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 10 | 7 |
| Vanbrugh 2s | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 4 |
| Wentw’th 2s | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | -7 | 3 |
| Goodricke 3s | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | -16 | 0 |
Group 4 ** (Halifax deducted 1 point for fielding an ineligible player)
| Team | Pl. | W. | D. | L. | GD. | Pts. |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Halifax 1s | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 6** |
| James 2s | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 6 |
| Derwent 2s | 3 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 5 |
| Wentw’th 1s | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 4 |
| Vanbrugh 3s | 4 | 0 | 0 | 4 | -16 | 0 |
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