You win club, you lose club
Shocking news reaches me that local slag-pit Toffs is to start staying open until 4am every night. 4am? Good grief, that’s very nearly tomorrow. With the University failing to respond by moving its schedule forward two hours, we have reached something of a impasse. This can only have a detrimental effect on lecture attendance; I fear for all our degrees.
All is not lost in the war against decadence though. Happy-haters will be delighted to learn that nightlife-wholesaler Ikon shall not rise again, its owners having failed to palm it off to anyone else as a club. This perhaps because it looks like, and essentially is, a warehouse in a car park. They’re now applying to have its status changed, to the entirely more appropriate “bulky goods retail unit”. Apparently Ikea are interested.
With York’s paltry allowance of four clubs now whittled down to a pathetic three, which of our endangered discotheques will be next to go? Are we to be picking up Swedish flat-pack furniture in Ziggy’s any time soon? Whatever can be done? Answers on a postcard, and I mean now.
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